Shock as Couple Try and Adopt Son's Friend Due to His Mom's Lack of Money

Raising a child alone is notoriously difficult, especially when there's a lack of financial support—and with the rising cost of childcare, it's no surprise one single mom was delighted when a couple offered to look after her son. In a viral Reddit post, u/livinginfearmom, she explained she has raised her son, Owen, eight, "to know that money isn't everything." She pointed out she doesn't receive any child support from his father and that her parents had disowned her, therefore it is just the two of them. According to U.S. Census statistics, about seven in 10 custodial parents who were supposed to receive child support from noncustodial parents received either full or partial child support payments. However, 30 percent of custodial parents who were supposed to receive child support in 2017 received no payments. The mom states her son usually spends the school holidays at a free or low-cost camp for kids. But last year, Owen's friend's parents were keen to help the 24-year-old mom with childcare.

At first, the offer was a one-off as the mom couldn't get Owen into spring break camp in 2022. But then the schoolboy began spending more and more time with his friend Charlie and his parents, Nate and Paige, who refused to accept reimbursement for the activities and even a vacation. She wrote: "I admit, I did feel a tad uncomfortable with her spending this much on my son, but at the same time, I didn't want to deprive Owen of this stuff." "I kept telling Nate and Paige that there's no way I could ever pay them back and they kept insisting that they loved having Owen around. They told me what a great kid he is," she added. While the mom was flattered, she began to feel uneasy after discovering the parents yearned for another child, but were unable to have one. "They know that Owen will never make up for not having a brother, but if they can give him a consistent playmate so he's not lonely, they'll do it. Should this have been a red flag? Maybe. But at the same time, I found it sweet that the boys considered each other brothers. I thought it was innocent," she said.

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However, things took a turn for the worse at Christmas when the parents "insisted" they look after Owen during the festive break. The mom said alarm bells started to ring when she noticed the parents purchased more presents than she did for her son. "Fast forward to now. Spring break was last week and this time, Paige and Nate didn't just offer to take care of him during the day while I worked, they asked if Owen could spend the entire week at their house," she wrote. The mom agreed as this meant she could pick up extra shifts and put the money toward a bike for Owen's birthday. However, when she went to pick him up, the parents asked if Owen could stay a little longer. "I felt weird and said, no, it was time for Owen to come home. That's when Nate suggested that Owen stay with them long-term. I could still see him, but they would take care of him. I thought they were joking and said "Like what, you'd be his guardians or something?" "They got quiet and the reality rushed over me. I pointed out that this wasn't a movie. They can't just get custody. They started spouting some legal stuff about how I could assign them as guardians and they would help make this transition smooth. They told me to think about Owen and what's best for him. I told them there was no way in hell I was going to give up my son." The shook up mom states that now she has blocked them and notified the police and school. "I'm so lost. And I feel so stupid because looking back, all the warning signs were there," she concludes.

'Harmful Behavior Rarely Presents Itself With Clear Warning Signs'

Athar A. Khan, a family law specialist attorney in Orange County, spoke to Newsweek about the Reddit, which has 13,000 upvotes. Khan said: "I would describe their behavior as inappropriate or disrespectful of common boundaries, but I would not go as far as calling it "grooming." "To protect one's child, it's essential to be mindful of red flags like the mother recognized in hindsight. However, since harmful behavior rarely presents itself with clear warning signs, it's helpful to establish general boundaries regarding the types of gifts a child can receive and the amount of time a child spends with others, especially when alone. "All parents learn from their mistakes, and as a young single parent, this mother might not have known better. Participating in support groups for single parents can be beneficial, as it allows parents to discuss such situations as they unfold and gain outside perspectives before things escalate." The post has received 1,200 comments since it was shared on April 10. The top comment alone has 9,000 upvotes. It said: "It's one thing to offer support for a single parent with less means. It's another to take up guardianship of someone else's child. They're not thinking right and Owen would always be "second class" to their son. They think they're doing you and Owen a favor, but they're really just "buying" their son a brother and playmate. It's so weird. "This is a tricky and complicated moment though because they will have developed a strong trust with Owen, and can easily use Charlie to manipulate Owen against you. I don't know if telling Owen would be ideal (you don't want to burden kids) but leaving him in the dark also seems risky, because as a single mum you can easily be targeted and have him turned against you. Seeking assistance from authorities like [the] police and the school, getting advice on how best to protect and inform your son, and keeping records, seem ideal. Good luck. You are a great mum and don't let anyone convince you otherwise." "This they try to buy a playmate. And if Charlie grows up to be a cranky teenager and they have their first real fight and Charlie is not that into Owen anymore what then? I think we all know what then... Wow. Just wow," said another. Newsweek reached out to u/livinginfearmom for comment. We couldn't verify the details of the case. If you have a family dilemma, let us know via life@newsweek.com. We can ask experts for advice, and your story could be featured on Newsweek.